Ok, so Cathy pointed me in the direction of this Japanese aesthetic called Wabi-Sabi, and essentially it's centered on the flow of life and transiance. Artworks that employ wabi-sabi are all about how beauty can be humble, impermenant and imperfect -- and how this can be more beautiful than artficality, beacause it's more natural.
So I've been trying to work that into these poems. I'm trying to make them into small snapshots or objects -- kind of tiny, melencholy moments that aren't too complex, but are broken up in a poignant way that attempts to highlight the issues working in the pieces -- concerns about body image, aging, and the effects of time and self-esteem on self perception. None of them are longer than forty syllables, and I tried to make them homespun, and humble, both in their subject matter and consruction.
Wabi-sabi objects are often really rough, asymmetrical and I tried to transfer that onto the page by making the pieces seem ragged and definatly asymmetrical. I plan to continue to construct them in this way, and also to try to make them seem more unfinished, perhaps leaving off without any kind of ending.
I think that's an interesting strategy. Space is a really underutilized yet potentially powerful element. e.e. cummings comes to mind. Making poetry 3D is trickier because of the increased freedoms, but it provides some unique opportunities. I think it's intriguing to see how space, shape, proximity, and such can change the meaning of language or combine to supplement it. In any case the opportunity for it to have a unique identity to stand on is there.
ReplyDeleteIt being a Japanese form in a western context is plus, also.
The Grandmother poem stuck with me the most. I love the lips curled over the tea cup. What an image! I can just imagine wrinkly old lips sucking on the edge of porcelain , ew.
ReplyDelete"Crease, purl, pale." I think this is a perfect image of a grandmother and it is effective on its own line. The way you spelled purl was smart because I think of PEARL (a typical grandmother jewelry).
Overall I think these are very interesting pieces of art. The last poem is more confusing that the rest, considering that some of the words are not even words, but like you said, you want it to be rough and choppy. It slows the reader down to really focus on the words and sounds.
Rae! I know I posted on this before! grr.
ReplyDeleteWell, sorry for making you wait, and here it is again. :)
I'm lovin' the wabi-sabi style. It feels so beautifully loose and organic and you're doing a marvelous job with the work breaks. (it's like the idea of something being greater than the sum of it's parts, but in reverse: By breaking the whole into it's parts, you produce a kind of splintered, flowery cluster of meaning around it; the connotations of each word part in addition to the word as a whole, a greater appreciation for the sounds of each separate part. It's literary dissection, but a living dissection; a transplantation, two roots separated and allowed to bloom into wholly new plants).
...wow. I get off topic waaay too easily.
Anyway, something to consider as you go are the gestalt imagery that your eyes produce when viewing the poem at a glance. what lines and curves arise through those scattered fragments? You may try to produce an image either pleasing and in cooperation with the images evoked in the text, or something separate, a jarring juxtaposition.
Keep up the great work!